There are loads of articles on the 'net that give women a hard time: 5 reasons why you don't need a girlfriend, why women only make your life worse, and 10 reasons why my toaster is better than my wife, to name but a few. So, in our attempt to level the playing field, we list the top 10 reasons why a wife is actually better than man's real best friend -- his PC.
1. Your wife never breaks down. Well, rarely anyway. And at least this never happens when you've got something really important to do -- in her case it's either after a teary episode of Eastenders, or just after you've announced her mother-in-law's arrival. You'll still be able to get on with what you wanted to do; no problem.
2. She doesn't need constant updates. Whilst your PC needs newer versions of software to keep running smoothly, your wife will keep trudging along with the minimal of attention. Well, she may require some TLC from time to time, but at least this is cheaper than the latest version of Windows.
3. She doesn't need to be 'turned' on to work. In fact, many wives go through the majority of their married lives without being turned on at all...
4. She never loses her memory. All those files and photos that disappear from your PC in a Flash? Never happens with a wife. Every single thing is stored permanently, so don't worry: all those mistakes you've made in the past are recalled with ease.
5. Your wife gives you things. OK, they may be somewhat unusual gifts -- who really wants a talking toothbrush for their birthday? -- but it's the thought that counts. The only thing Mr. PC gives you is a headache.
6. PCs don't touch back. No matter how hard you try (and no matter what website you're surfing), your computer will never reach out and touch you.
7. Your wife looks fantastic. Even if your PC has a see-through case with flashing LEDs to boot, you still won't be carrying a photo of it in your wallet.
8. Alcohol and PCs don't go together. Pour some vodka on your keyboard if you want proof of this. A nice bit of rum and your wife, however, and a good night is usually had by all.
9. You'll never be called a geek for spending too much time with your wife. If you're playing World of Warcraft until the early hours, however, then you'll never avoid that jibe.
10. Your wife can't be bought. To get the very best PC you need very deep pockets. To get the most amazing wife you don't need any money at all... pockets. To get the most amazing wife you don't need any money at all...
