When you and your spouse got married you promised each other you would stay together “until death do you part”. So what was it that caused you and your spouse to consider a divorce as an answer? When did the Honeymoon end so to speak? If you can recall the things you loved about your spouse that made you fall in love in the first place, you’ll be on the fast track to saving your marriage. I’ve included 5 simple tips to help you here in this article.
Step one. Plan time to be alone together on a regular basis. Keep your cell phones off, no emailing friends and definitely no Facebook. Not even to post a picture of you at the restaurant or anything. During this “date”, have one agenda in mind. Talk with your spouse and tell him or her how you really feel about things. Them him/her your likes and dislikes. Focus on listening to one another, almost like you did when you first met and your spouse mesmerized you.
Step two. Write a love letter to your spouse. Odds are, if you’re thinking about having a divorce it’s probably been a long while since you wrote a love letter to your husband or wife. By doing this, you’ll throw your spouse off guard and make them think twice about leaving. This will also help remind you why you fell in love in the first place. Remember, what you focus on expands. So try focusing on your partner’s good attributes and write a letter telling him/her how much you love them.
Step three. Plan a date night with your spouse. This does not mean a dinner and movie in the home. Have a date outside of the home and take your spouse out on the town so to speak. Go somewhere nice at least twice a once so both of you have to dress up and go somewhere fun twice a month where you’ll both share lots of laughs. You probably did this when you were dating. There’s no reason why you shouldn’t do it now too.
Step four. Treat yourself to something nice. If for some reason you feel self-conscious it probably shows. You’ll probably reflect that in your over all attitude. Buy yourself a new outfit or spend an afternoon at the spa. The confidence you’ll have when you’re through will show and you’ll look much more attractive to your spouse. (Personally, I’ve always found it hard to leave a girl when she’s attractive). It’s easier to leave someone in a pair of sweat pants and hair curlers than it is to leave someone in a nice dress skirt and sharp blouse.
Step five. Your spouse should be your number one priority. Not your job and not your kids. Even in the Bible it teaches us “husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies” Ephesians 5:28. And “wives should submit to their husbands in everything” Ephesians 5:24. The bottom line here is your spouse should come first. The second you begin to put anything in between your spouse and yourself, your marriage is headed for disaster. Take a moment each day and tell your spouse you’re thinking of them. It could be a phone call, text message, email, twitter, facebook or any other form of media we have.
If you really want to save your marriage and avoid having a divorce it’ll take a little work from both of you. It took both of you to fall in love together, and it’ll take both of you to stay in love and stay married. Divorce is rarely the answer and I truly home you and yours work our your marriage. Because as my father taught me, “A wife is for life”.
If you are in the position where your are thinking about a divorce, your trust in your partner is likely to be shattered. Learn how to save your marriage, even if the other person doesn’t want to. Visit Save Your Marriage for more information.
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