Abusive Relationship Healing: Biofeedback And Self-regulation For Domestic Abuse Survivors

Control is the central theme of intimate partner violence. Both during and after the abusive relationship, domestic abuse survivors seek to sort out the unfinished business and unresolved issues around control.

In my work with domestic violence survivors, I have found that when I give them a regimen that assists them in cultivating internal control, they thrive. And they heal.

For example, when a domestic abuse survivor begins to learn how to regulate their autonomic nervous system, they feel utterly empowered by the fact that they are able to control their internal physiology.

Symptoms are reduced, anxiety is regulated, depression is lifted, insomnia is curbed, panic attacks are mitigated, chronic pain is significantly reduced, and irritable bowl syndrome and hypertension are also reduced.

While the symptom reduction is extremely beneficial to the survivor, the psychological emotional effects of the ability to regulate one’s internal physiology takes them miles into recovery…into healing the effects of having been and/or being in a controlling, abusive relationship.

Patients have told me that for the first time since the abusive relationship began, they feel as though they now own their own bodies. They know where the “on” switch is and where the “off” switch is, and they know how to actually turn it “on” and turn it “off.”

That is, they know how to lower autonomic arousal of the stress response at will. They are in the driver’s seat and have found the wheel. And once they hold this wheel, they don’t want to let it go. Empowerment is now in the tissue and giving it up is unheard of.

I can hear in their voices less generalized vulnerability…greater command from the inside out. While biofeedback and self-regulation are certainly not a panacea; this training provides an experiential learning step essential to healing while in and after an abusive relationship.

If you are in an abusive relationship, or recently ended one, consider self-regulation training as a way of catapulting yourself back into health and well-being.

By: Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.

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For more healing insights benefiting domestic abuse survivors, visit www.PreventAbusiveRelationships.com and claim your free Survivor Success Tips & eInsights. Dr. Jeanne King, PhD. is founding director of Partners in Prevention, dedicated to helping domestic abuse survivors and their advocates. © 2008 Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.