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Anger...how Well Do You Cope?
When do you blow up at someone? When do you verbally lash out? When do you physically lash out at people? Is it if someone doesn’t clean up after themselves, says the wrong thing, plays music too loud? Have you reacted badly and been confused about how to manage your anger? Is this why you are reading this book and looking at ways to control your actions? Ever been told to count to 10 to deal with your anger? Forget this instruction! This is just a band-aid solution to the problem. I don’t believe that anger management is the problem. Instead how people deal with their anger is the problem. They simply don’t know how to do it. Specifically they don’t know how to be assertive and proactive once feelings of anger arise within them. Lets kick off this discussion through looking at the importance of conflict for people and between humans and what we need to do to deal with our anger more effectively. Ultimately as human beings we are scared of confrontation. Yes you did hear me clearly. WE ARE SCARED OF CONFRONTATION. This may seem like an outrageous proposition considering our history. After all we did descend from cavemen who’s job it was to kill other animals. In fact they relied on conflict (specifically killing other animals) for their very own survival. Survival of the fittest, Darwinism in action. And what if you had a dispute with another member of your tribe? Did you go to mediation? NO. Did you go to relationship counseling? NO. You would physically fight it out. And assuming you didn’t kill each other, you both moved on with your lives. Do you think they had anger management problems back then? Our evolutionary development is not the problem. It has provided us with a very effective way of dealing with our anger…by dealing with it in the moment, through conflict resolution - usually physical conflict. In fact the use of physical violence to settle disputes has been present throughout time, it only has died off recently (excuse the pun). I asked my grandfather and uncles how they use to deal with disputes during their school years. And in both generations they said that they would settle a dispute that they had with someone through a physical fight and shake hands with the other person afterwards. Now I’m not condoning physical fighting and suggesting that you should settle all of your fights with a physical confrontation. What I’m suggesting is that you should deal with your anger as it arises. Couples Counselling Melbourne seo brisbane Article Directory: http://www.articledashboard.com Anger Management Melbourne...Get the help you need! |
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