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Chavez On Us Oil Find In Gulf Of Mexico; Result Of Leak From Venezuela
A reporter asked, “How have you been able to determine that, President Chavez?” “No problem,” Chavez said, reaching into his pocket. “I have an oil-pressure gauge that I carry with me at all times, and I check the pressure in Venezuela’s oil wells every single day.” He held up the implement. “See, an oil-pressure gauge. So one day last week, I noticed a drop. Next thing I know, Chevron reports a big find. I demand that the imperialist US plug the leak or I’ll say even more nice things about Castro.” President Bush, when queried about Chavez’s position, said, “As you know, I have been a champion of American oil independence, and it’s a poor loser like Chavez who makes me advocate it. Here’s what I say back.” At this point, he reached into a presidential pocket and pulled out an American-made oil-pressure gauge. “I have my little measuring device, too, and I have determined that all the oil pressure in Venezuela is actually the result of a leak from the Gulf of Mexico. So I demand that Chavez plug the wells in his own country and start to buy oil from us. I also demand a complete refund for all the oil we bought from Venezuela before we found out it came from America.” How will the high-pressure debate work out? We are, it seems, at the mercy of time and the highly competitive effort of drilling for dollars. Article Directory: http://www.articledashboard.com Tom Attea, humorist and creator of NewsLaugh.com, has had six shows produced Off-Broadway. Critics have called his writing "delightfully funny," "witty," with "great humor and ebullience" and "good, genuine laughs." |
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