Check Reputations And Backgrounds To Ensure Your Personal Safety

In this frightening age of stalkers, child molesters, carjackers, rapists, murderers and all the rest of the career criminal smorgasbord, it is important to proceed with caution when meeting new people. Some things to consider when assessing new acquaintances are the following: How was this person brought to your attention? Was he referred to you by friends? Did your mother introduce you? Or did he approach you out in public or at your place of employment? How exactly did you meet this person?

If you met him in a random location, especially if he approached you without any type of invitation, it’s important to take your time to get to know him before getting involved. If you met him over the internet, perhaps in a discussion forum or on a social networking site, it’s critical that you find out as much as possible about him in the real world. The best time to do this is before you invest more time communicating and forming a relationship. And it should definitely be accomplished prior to setting up a real life meeting.

These days, ensuring your personal security is a very serious matter. There are so many more factors to consider than what was necessary just ten years ago. The primary reason for this change is the advent of the internet and because many of us are forming online relationships with people sight unseen. I’m not saying that it’s not possible to meet a wonderful person on the web, I’m saying that if you choose to go this route you should proceed with caution.

If the question of meeting in person arises, make sure that you know some vital information about your newfound friend. Do you know his real name or do you only know his online nickname or first name? Do you know where he resides? What type of work does he do? Who is his employer? Is he married? Does he have children, whether he is married or not? These questions and more are considerations that you must make prior to agreeing to get together.

Don’t let the fact that you are lonely cloud your judgment. One of the afternoon talk shows recently featured a woman who had been conned by a “gentleman” whom she met online. This women wasn’t the low class uneducated sort, she was a sophisticated middle class woman who seemed to be highly intelligent. Her downfall was that she was lonely, probably because she was too busy with her workaday life to go out and meet people in the real world.

And so she relied upon her internet connection to expand her social circle. Unfortunately she encountered a shady character. After a short while of being in contact, her new boyfriend started asking her to send him money. That was such a definitive red flag warning that something’s not quite right, you would think that she would have known better. Who sends money to someone that they met over the internet, someone whom they never even met in person?

She also spoke to him on the telephone and I’m sure he had one of those romantic hypnotic voices that causes the ladies to swoon and fantasize about romantic evenings in the world’s most fantastic vacation spots. And then he asked her to marry him. Again, they hadn’t ever even met when he proposed they get married. This otherwise perfectly reasonable woman went out and bought a wedding dress and expected to meet her beau at the altar. What in the world was she thinking?

The story ends with her getting dumped and she never even knew who the con artist was. It turns out he sent her a picture that he snagged from a male modeling website, he was absolutely nothing like what she had been led to believe.

What is the moral of this story? It’s important that we are very selective about who we allow into our lives and who we permit to come into contact with our children. It’s bad enough that we allow unscrupulous characters into our lives, but it’s unforgivable when we bring someone into our home who harms our children.

If you are uncertain about the new person that you recently met, it may well be worth it to hire a detective to do a background check, or do a bit of snooping on your own. Ask questions. Take notes. If he tells you one thing one day and another thing the next, chances are he is trying to mislead you.

Even if you have no reason to be suspicious, it’s better to take control of this situation before it controls you. Go to the trouble now to verify his identity and intentions before it’s too late. An ounce of prevention and all of that.

By: Rose Charles

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