As a single Christian, you may have pondered about whether you are spiritually ready for a dating relationship. Perhaps you came here looking for some Christian dating advice on the subject. I have found myself unsure of the topic many times. I have concluded on many occasions, after dating relationships have ended, that I am not ready because the dates don’t seem to develop into longer-lasting relationships. I thought, there must be a reason. I was not sure what being ready meant but I thought, God must know what He’s doing. However, I couldn’t help but feel a little worthless at times. I have thought maybe something is wrong with me, and that God has someone for me but I was, somehow, messing up His plan by getting too nervous or excited in the dating process. All the while, I have tried to be content in God, while keeping a door open to the eligible mates that might pop into my life. But, what do we do when we meet and click with someone? As the dating decisions start, how can we know if we are spiritually ready to start a dating relationship with someone (whatever our definition of dating may be)?
Generally speaking, dating is another form of a relationship. We have friends, work colleagues, marriages, and, most importantly, our relationship with God. Each relationship’s degree of intimacy takes the effort of both parties to develop and maintain. In the case of dating, the effort that goes into the relationship is based on our dating definitions. There is no biblical answer to how we should date; yet, the spiritual welfare of our brother and sister in Christ should always be of importance. Some people may say that dating is a friendship that can develop into something more serious if all goes well; others take a more conservative stance, involving families and a preparation for marriage. Being ready for the latter would mean much more preparation, before a dating commitment is made, than it would take for being ready for a less serious dating relationship commitment. Whatever perspective someone has on dating can play a key role in being ready.
I would say that there is a difference between being generally ready and being spiritually ready to date someone. General readiness is a subjective term; it usually means being physically or emotionally ready in the world’s eyes and can include things such as finished school, having time to maintain the relationship, or having an understanding about what a pure Christian dating relationship looks like. I would say that spiritual readiness is more important and should be developed, regardless of our dating definitions. An understanding of our identity in Christ, before getting intimately involved with another person, is key to being spiritually ready. I would also define spiritual readiness as being ready to love someone else, including all the things that 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 says about love. Take a moment to read it now. You may be thinking that this type of love is hard to find or that it takes time to develop, so how can we be spiritually ready to love someone in a dating relationship? The catch is that this scripture describes God’s love for us, and only when we have met God and understand His love for us, personally, are we ready to be vessels of the same love. In other words, God is able to use us to show His love for another human being. Of course, love grows and develops through the dating process; nevertheless, being spiritually ready to love someone, as well as having a clear understanding of our identity in Christ, is great preparation for Christian dating relationships.
Looking for more christian dating advice? Then be sure to check out my blog where I give dating advice to Christians looking to find the perfect person for them.
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