Commanding. Dynamic. Focused. Clear. Incisive. Insightful. In control. Organised.If you were to place a tick next to these characteristics if you associated them with great leaders, the chances are that you would tick most of them. They are after all the typical things that most of us associate with leadership.And it would follow naturally that learning to lead would probably mean learning how to embody these characteristics to a greater extent.Learning to leadIt follows too that when we think of developing ourselves as leaders, we tend to imagine that more information regarding leadership can help us have greater quantities of these characteristics – in other words, that information can help us to become more like this.In line with this view, leadership development programmes tend to create environments in which these characteristics can be emulated. For example, when we study finance or strategy, are we not really trying to mould the future? Trying to make it more predictable by controlling the present more skillfully? Clearly, we are trying to become more insightful, clear, focused, in control. The business literature over which we pore enables us to become more – commanding, incisive, insightful… And that may be just where the problem lies. For having more information is clearly not the determinant of leadership success. If it were, business school professors would be tycoons, and the likes of Messrs. Trump and Welch would be estate agents and electrical handymen by comparison. Notwithstanding this obvious truth, still we associate leadership development with more information.What is the missing ingredient?The text-book leaderImagine a text-book leader. This text-book leader has all the theories, all the information, all the jargon, all the latest analytic techniques from the consultants, all the action plans. In short, everything. But there may be one vital ingredient missing from this full head, one blind spot in this enviably controlled world. The problem with "textbook" solutions is that elements that breathe life into them are missing. Consider for a moment that those who agree to be lead may be compelled by that which animates leaders. Anima is Latin for “soul”, and to ‘animate’ is to ‘introduce life into something’, to vitalise, to enliven. When this secret alchemy is missing, no life is created, no vibrancy - merely the grey banality of transactional living. But what communicates animation? What inspires? What is the antidote to banality? Are those who agree to be lead not inspired by the intimate and subtle connection that is invited through the broadcast of animation?"It is the quality of personal interaction and dialogue which will determine how effective the application of technical leadership and management practices is."Animation, connection, and performance"But," you might exclaim, "I communicate with teams and individuals all the time - there is constant feedback on performance, objectives achieved, successes, failures and weaknesses. Everyone is in touch with progress and developments all the time! Why is the performance culture and ethic not kicking in?"The answer probably has something to do with an emotional component which is vital to the leadership formula. This is frequently, and I believe inaccurately, seen as some rare characteristic, unique to a few charismatic - and born, not made - leaders. This can leave mere mortals looking on with envy and disgruntlement.This is where the so-called "emotional quotient" comes into play. The cognitive, analytical and intellectual components are insufficient on their own to inspire a performance culture. They must be balanced with the emotional, inspirational element.There is a simple analogy to explain the importance of emotion, of soul. You could for instance learn to play a piece of music with technical accuracy, pressing the loud pedal when indicated on the sheet of music, accelerating when required, turning up the rhythm or softening the tone - and leave your audience totally uninspired - because you have not breathed meaning and soul into the music. The trick is in finding the soul. You cannot express soul without the technique, but you must transcend the mere technique, infuse it with emotion.Herein lies the paradox of learning to lead.Learning to EmoteManagers and aspiring leaders are too frequently instructed only in the world of strategies, scenarios, and business cases, neglecting the emotional quotient. Consider the typical advert for a development programme. It will be resplendent in promises of leading-edge practices, renowned speakers, bejewelled resumés, and immersion in head-work. Seldom will such an advert make reference to deepening insight into the nature of the connectedness one creates as a leader. Business schools apparently do not specialise in mobilising emotion, in animating, except via the expected superlatives surrounding performance. Herein, incidentally, one of the great myths of modern leadership: connectedness does in fact not flow from hype. Hyperbole does not engender hyper-formance, and spin should not be confused with inspiration. Leaders talking up the heroic feats that await us does not really cut it, except perhaps in Hollywood.And it must be remembered that merely receiving information about this emotional aspect is totally inadequate. To talk about the importance of Emotional Quotient is not to emote.Seldom is epiphany on offer – because it is very difficult to manufacture.“Piffle. Stuff and nonsense”, I hear the cynics snort. But bear with me: let me show you how a hard, heroic, masculine leadership culture is its own biggest obstacle."Hyperbole does not engender hyper-formance, and spin should not be confused with inspiration."Learning about emotional connectionHow does one gain the insight and skill needed in this space? How does one create the opportunities which make it possible to gain these skills? First and foremost, it is extremely seldom that more information on ‘connection’ or ‘emotional quotient’ that will bring about change. Often, development or change relies on a personal experience, a revelation, or epiphany if you like. It is receiving feedback that suddenly provides you with a startling insight into or perspective on yourself¸ the way you are affecting others, the impact your communication or behaviour has on them and the way they react. It is this insight that made Freud place the “ ‘Aha!’ experience” at the centre of psychoanalytic thought on personal change.Reaching such insights often requires a new openness to oneself and others, a willingness to perceive the world from a different angle, even a more open self-criticism in recognising one’s effect on others. Such openness is not prevalent in hard, heroic environments.What a good leader does, is to evoke the best in others through this his or her own behaviour. But if he (or she) doesn't have insight into how people experience him (or her, etc.), he cannot tap into this ability . And employees will sense an inherent disengagement, despite any measure of sincere-sounding words. The essential “fizz” in the connection will be missing."The hard, heroic ego interposes self-control between the leader and the potential connectedness he could learn to embody."Too often, managers and prospective leaders are inhibited by the roles they feel they have to play and the image they must conform to. A leader - as we have seen - is a type of "hero" figure - decisive, visionary, undeterred by crises or problems, able to take the lead. Yet in adopting these very postures, he is encased in a role, an image, a shell which makes him less effective in the long run, and less open to the transformative power of openness, less accessible to epiphany. In playing out the accepted role, he shuts his inner self down. The hard heroic ego interposes self-control between the leader and the potential connectedness he could learn to embody.It is the unconscious element of playing the role that is the trap. If you are in "hero mode" you can't change, because you are so locked in to the way heroes do things that you don't have "revelations" or "emotional insights". You can only fake them to make your persona - your mask – shine more brightly. Only when you become aware of the stereotypes to which you are conforming can you effectively change your behaviour. Heroes shine, they don't reflect. We tend to admire clever people, but we don’t necessarily follow them - leaders inspire followings. Leaders need to let their guard down, drop the image, explore feelings, thoughts and intuitions that would normally not be associated with being "heroic", if they want to learn the soul-arts of deeper connectedness, and of greater inspiration.Epiphany inherently involves allowing the mask to drop. Personal transformation happens in the real emotional world, not in the staged world of the persona.So the development challenge is to find ways of entering an environment where emotional revelations can occur. Interestingly, the emotional input for change often arises from a crisis - but this should not be necessary. A willingness to engage, to explore the unknown regions of the self, to be honest about interpersonal actions and dialogue are the important factors. It is seeing yourself in the mirror, how you do things and what effect you have on people that will allow you to become aware of the rules which unconsciously structure your behaviour. Reflecting on those will free you from them. Revelation and insight become the change mechanism which releases the true leadership potential. This usually happens in environments that are safe, and characterised by trust and nurturance. Not in environments strutting with other heroes.So next time you see an advert for a safe, nurturing business school experience that will allow you to drop your mask and explore the quality of connectedness your create, with the promise of transformative personal epiphanies, grab the opportunity! It is going to do a lot for you. It is going to do even more for your teams. And it is definitely going to be great for your business when the connection that you embody communicates itself to a world hungry for something more substantial than action plans and workaday blues.
Dr. Derek Shirley holds a Doctoral degree in psychology and various professional credentials in both South Africa and in the USA. The focus of his doctoral studies was professional development in an African cross-cultural context. He is the co-founder of Cornerstone Performance Solutions
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