Forgiveness of other people is not an easy thing to do. Just ask anyone who has been hurt emotionally hurt by the actions of another person. These emotional wounds, unlike physical ones, almost never heal with time.
The bigger the damage, the more difficult it is to forgive. And if the person who caused the damage was close to you, letting go becomes even more and more difficult.
However, the ability to forgive is good for the soul, as they say. When you forgive someone, you are doing yourself a bigger favor than the person you are forgiving. If you are having trouble forgiving someone, then you must be experiencing some kind of emotional pain. The grudge you might be holding against another person is a form of negative energy that remains in your body until this energy is released. If you do not release it, it will only bring you down, and it will have its negative emotional, and even physical, impact on you.
EFT is very helpful in cases where forgiving is difficult. It helps you release the barriers that are preventing you from releasing your emotional pain. If you would like to fogive someone, but you are finding it difficult to do so, you might want to try tapping on it using some of the set up phrases below. Read these set up statements and see which ones resonates with how you feel, and start tapping.
"Even though part of me does not want to forgive X, I deeply and completely love and forgive myself"
"Even though he/she does not deserve to be forgiven..."
"Even though what he or she did really hurt me.."
"Even though I was shocked because I did not expect it from X.."
"Even though I don't think I can ever forgive X.."
"Even though I would be weak if I forgive X.." (This is a good one if you believe forgiveness is a sign of weakness"
"Even though I have so much anger inside me towards X.."
etc...
Each of these set up statments can end with "I deeply and completely love and forgive myself"
It might be difficult in this case to end the set up statment with "I choose to forgive X" because you are still trying to get rid of the blocks. However, you can use a different wording that your mind will accept, such as "I choose to at least try to forgive X, if I can". When you word it the latter way, you are making the change more gradual, and it becomes easier for you to accept.
If you are forgiving someone for something that is not that serious, it will be pretty easy after a couple of rounds. But when it comes to more serious damage, I suggest that you take your time, and be gentle with yourself. This is a very deep process because you are reaching for the pain that is embedded deeply inside you. Once you feel in your heart that you are ready to forgive, you will know it. And when you do, it's going to feel great.
Note: When it comes to traumatic issues, I highly advise that an expert is consulted. I do not recommend that the tapping is done alone. This is especially true for cases related to childhood traumas. The emotioanal pain might be too difficult to bare alone and it is better to have someone who is a trained professional in this field with you.
