Getting Angry: How To Control It

Why do we get angry—all of us get angry sometimes. Most of us are able to control our anger yet, some of us get angry all of a sudden. Many suppress or restrain their anger, whereas some simply express it. And is there any way to control or deal with anger the healthy way, and how do you do that? We get angry when we usually don’t get our way. We get angry when our desires or aims are unfulfilled, or when we are stopped doing something we really want to do. We also get mad when most people do not agree to our points of view or we get irritated when our opinions are at great difference with other people.

Hence, we aren’t able to understand the other point of view as well and eventually disagree with that. Some of us never get angry over small or trivial things (or issues) at all, it is because they do not take things very seriously, like some people. That is the nature of some of these people. So, can we use any methods or techniques to control our ire? Okay, let’s examine things. Do you react too quickly or do you even think about what went wrong before reacting? Those who think about it before reacting are able to understand and compose themselves so likewise, they control their feelings better.

On the contrary, those of us who react too suddenly and spontaneously, get angry real fast. Think about a certain common situation and imagine or visualize the possible emotions and reactions. List some of your friends you can think of. For instance, imagine we have this current situation—a friend of yours is sitting in a café and somebody accidentally spills something hot on her/his hands. Okay, now imagine the different possible reactions from the list. You can write some reactions that might differ greatly. You can also picture out one of your friends just laughing it off and yet another pal calling the owner or manager and making a big scene.

All the reactions are all different simply because they are expressing and dealing with their anger in all different ways. As we all have our own opinions, so do other people. Trying to understand and realize other people’s point of view helps in many given situations. And if we all have varied viewpoints, why try to force our opinions and thoughts on them? Try and understand what and why they think that way or just leave them with that. If your boss is mad at you, try not to react immediately. Give some time to think and ponder about all the probable reasons and you may find the answer to his anger.

If at the end of the day you realized that his anger is completely unjustified, you can choose to forgive and not react angrily too. Emotions like being angry can be controlled. It needs reflection and practice to exercise proper restraint. A very helpful tip is to count up to 10 before reacting. When you win over your anger, you would become a better and improved person. Do not be enslaved by your anger; make it your slave instead.

By: Amy Twain

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The author of this article Amy Twain is a Self Improvement Coach who has been successfully coaching and guiding clients for many years. Amy just published a new home study course on how to boost your Self Esteem overnight. More info about this “Quick-Action Plan for A More Confident You” is available at www.FabulousSelfEsteem.com.