How To Make Friends With Your Work Colleagues

It can sometimes be difficult to make friends with your work colleagues, particularly if you are starting a new job or moving into a new team.

After all, just because you spend much of the week in their company, it doesn’t mean you have anything in common. It can be particularly difficult to make friends if you are younger than everyone else, naturally shy, or the ‘new person’. You may be the only man in a team full of women, or vice versa, but if you don’t make the effort to make friends at work then life can get pretty lonely.

Be friendly. Not just saying ‘good morning’ as you walk into the office, but stopping to spend a few seconds with your colleagues chatting about the weekend, the latest X Factor result or complimenting them on their new haircut or jacket. Make eye contact and smile. Show that you are genuinely interested in your work colleagues’ life outside work.

If you are really shy, seek out a friendly face and then build up friends gradually. If you can make friends with one colleague, they will generally introduce you to their friends and so on. Even if you feel tongue-tied, smile a lot and show that you are listening by nodding and laughing. Sometimes shy people can come across as aloof or arrogant if they are not careful with their body language.

Find things in common with people. So your work colleague likes reading comic books and collecting Star Wars figures, you’ve seen the film right? Ask him what his favourite characters are, where he finds the figures and what he plans to do with his collection. Be respectful of other people’s hobbies, even if privately you find them a bit odd. Ask a few questions and you are bound to find something you have in common – perhaps you both like the same television programme or went to the same school.

Be trustworthy. If someone confides in you, particularly if they are in ‘rant’ mode, never pass on what they say to someone else at work. Gossip spreads like wildfire around the workplace and you won’t be trusted again. Likewise be careful what you confide in others at work. You will be surprised how easy things get round, particularly if it’s something juicy like you fancy the boss.

Be helpful. If you can see that a colleague is struggling, ask them what you can do to help. It may be as simple as making them a cup of tea or fetching them a sandwich if they are working through lunch. Don’t be afraid to take on menial jobs to help a colleague - it will be much appreciated and people will respect you for rolling up your sleeves and being a team player.

Make sure you attend social functions, even if they are not what you would normally do on a night out. Show that you have a fun side but be wary of getting drunk or acting inappropriately unless you want pictures of you circulating on email the next day. If there aren’t many opportunities for socialising at your work, then organise a night out or lunch.

Remember that relationships can change as you progress, particularly if you become a manager. The people you thought were your friends may now view you with suspicion. You may find yourself torn between the good of the company and your loyalty to a particular colleague. Although it’s good to make friends in the office, remember that it is only a work place. A genuine friendship exists outside of work as well as within the confines of the office.

By: Vincent A Rogers

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Vincent Rogers is a freelance writer who writes for a number of UK businesses. Find Jobs in Poole with Castle Cover.