How To Overcome Loneliness, Prevent Fear Of Being Alone
Everyone feels lonely at one time or another. And it can be hard to make new friends in today's troubled and unpredictable world. The friends and acquaintances we have may be so busy and preoccupied they don't even notice how lonely we are. We may not tell them how we feel because we don't want to bother anyone. So . . . we suffer in silence.
Are you worried that nobody likes you? Feeling that nobody likes us or loves us is one of the most agonizing and devastating feelings in the world. Feeling as if you are unliked and unloved is tremendously depressing, because human beings are hard wired to be social creatures. We need to feel like a part of a group, or a part of humanity, even though we also want to be appreciated as unique human beings.
The fear of the unknown refers to fears that are based on absolutely nothing but act as mental obstacles. It prevents you from reaching your full potential in a number of areas of your life. Everytime you approach unfamiliarity in your life this fear of the unknown manifests itself and prevents you from taking further action. Instead you choose to do nothing and remain in your own personal comfort zone. For example, maybe you are used to being single. You start to get close to someone but as the relationship develops you get scared and back away.
To overcome loneliness, you need to have confidence and love your own company. Many dating experts advice that the most fundamental thing is self development. Make yourself attractive and make others comfortable in your company. If you are not good at encouraging conversations, work out on it. Do not condemn others and do not be too emotional in discussions. A lover does not want someone who is self-centered and who is so full of himself.
The problem when you are unable to stop feeling lonely is that you tend to show antisocial behavior. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts. You act as though you aren't interested in the people around you (for whatever reason) and they respond in kind. You are all missing out on the wonderful opportunity to get to know each other and it is essentially rooted in your deep seated fear of rejection and your reject first so that they cannot reject you attitude.
For people who suffer from severe shyness, this condition can be life crippling. People who are extremely shy can feel absolutely overwhelmed with uncomfortable emotions and physical sensations every time they try to talk to somebody. Even if they are talking to someone they know quite well, they are filled with shyness sensations.
People who suffer from a profound phobia of being by themselves are often forced to lead severely restricted lives. Those who simply fear loneliness, and don't want to spend Saturday night at home, can easily take the subway or bus by themselves, to attend a party. Not so for victims of that social phobia that forbids them from being unaccompanied at any one time.
