Personal Networking: Tips For Making The Most Out Of Every Contact
Tip #1: Avoid making snap judgments. You may glance at a person’s name tag, company or email address and immediately assume you know everything about them, including the fact that they couldn’t possibly have anything to offer you. You may be correct in assessing their likelihood to purchase your product/service themselves, but you have no idea who they know, who their next-door neighbor or spouse is, or who they’re related to. By focusing on whether or not someone can buy what you’re selling, you miss opportunities to make other connections or maybe even gain a referral.
I recently reached out to another business owner because I had been intrigued by her web site and thought there might be opportunities for us to be a resource for each other. I got a rather summary email back saying that since had all the networking connections she needed and she didn’t think we served the same market, but if I wanted to tell people about her products that would be nice. First of all, I don’t think it’s EVER possible to have all the connections you need! And secondly, she made an error assuming that since I didn’t focus on her target market that I had nothing to offer. Had we spoken, I could have connected her with several opportunities in her own market. Her snap judgment cost her the potential of thousands of dollars in lost revenue.
Tip #2: It’s not all about you. Listen first, think about how you can give, and then speak. When you let the other person go first, you have the opportunity to look for connections, possible referrals and ways you might be able to work together. Here’s something to remember, however, when someone else allows you to be the first to speak: don’t monopolize the conversation.
A good networking call has a natural rhythm of back and forth. Speak in short statements; don’t go from one topic to another without a break. Don’t launch into a litany of how many awards you’ve gotten or all the high-profile media you’ve been on. Make a statement. Pause. Give the other person a chance to react. Ask a question, and then follow up their answer with your own reply that seeks to make a connection. You already know all about you. If you never shut up, you won’t learn anything about the person you’re talking with—and that could cost you business or referrals.
Another call I was on recently took a turn for the worse when the person I contacted to explore opportunities talked non-stop about herself for eight minutes straight. (I know. I timed her.) She wasn’t seeking to connect; she was seeking to impress. Needless to say, we didn’t end up finding ways to help each other grow. What a wasted opportunity!
Tip #3: Keep your insecurities in check. It may be that you end up talking with someone who, at first glance, is in the same business. Don’t assume you are automatically competitors or worse, enemies. This is especially true if you’re in different regions on the country, but it also can be true for someone who is just across town. Companies that explore “coopetition”—a combination of competition and cooperation—weather tough economic times better than lone wolves.
I often talk with companies who are also technically in the marketing business. But as we discuss our strengths, it often turns out that we actually aren’t head-to-head competitors. In fact, many times we find that the strengths of the other organization can complement our own strengths. I’ve seen this result in collaborations on requests for proposals, big projects and other business.
Tip #4: Don’t be a diva. When someone contacts you to network it’s because they don’t have as much experience as you do and they want to learn from you, the master—right? Not necessarily. Don’t assume that someone who contacts you for networking is automatically junior in experience. Most likely, they are your peer and sometimes, they could be far ahead of you but humble enough to know that they still need to collaborate to get ahead.
The diva attitude shows up in many forms. It can be a condescending tone in an email, or a presumption that someone who may be younger is also less accomplished. It can show up in rigidity; for example, if the person contacting you needs to reschedule or misses a phone call for a business-related reason (it happens). Do you graciously reschedule (knowing that you’ve missed a few calls due to traffic and extended meetings yourself), or do you haughtily refuse to reschedule, declaring that “my time is important”? (Hint: Everyone’s time is important.) It’s safer to assume the person is of equivalent or greater experience and be flattered when you discover you are in the mentor role.
Tip #5: Plan for a positive outcome. You never know what might come from a simple networking contact or call. You might get connected to someone who changes your entire life. A friend of mine happened to mention to a networking contact (whom she’d just met) that her dream was to host a TV talk show. That contact connected my friend to the producer at a local TV station. From there, my friend did a pilot episode and then several more episodes on a specialty channel. Within a year, her show became syndicated. What a difference one conversation can make!
Gail Z. Martin owns DreamSpinner Communications and helps companies and solo professionals in the U.S. and Canada save money and get results through exceptional writing and marketing. Gail has an MBA in marketing and over 20 years of corporate and non-profit experience at senior executive levels. Gail hosts the Shared Dreams Marketing Podcast and the Shared Dreams Become Reality group on Facebook. She is also the author of The Summoner, The Blood King and Dark Haven fantasy adventure novels.
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