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“you’re A Bully.” “oh, Shut Up, You’re Just A Pushover!”
Understanding the natural elements that make up your child’s individuality, from temperament and multiple intelligences to the role environmental influences play, will strengthen your bond with your child and increase your child’s confidence which can have a lasting effect on their self esteem. Your Child is Uniquely Yours Answers to bad behaviors are not one-size-fit-all. Your child is not like any other. If you have more than one child, they may have similar traits, but they are different children. What works on one is not likely to work on the other. Let’s examine why that is. If you have one of those energetic, strong-willed or, as many would call them, “problem” children or bully you’ve probably had your share of frustration. If you have 2 or more children and one hardly gives you any trouble at all, you probably already know how hard it is to not label the seemingly “unruly” child and you are tested daily. Such a situation creates tension for all involved, mostly on your child because they expect you to have the answers. Understanding the why of individual behaviors, often provides the knowledge to resolve the what. When you understand how each child is designed to operate, you can apply workable solutions that produce desired results for each child; successful parenting depends on it. Fundamental Basics The origin of Psychology was established by Hippocrates, the father of medicine, and was based on temperament types: 4 basic fluids of the body that were later called Choleric, Sanguine, Phlegmatic and Melancholy. Hippocrates’ found that specified behaviors were consistent with each particular body fluid and that each person’s fluids were consistent. Temperaments distinguish human behaviors more than any other factor. There are many different modern personality systems created based on Hippocrates’ temperamental studies. Below is a brief description distinguishing the 4 types: 1. Choleric: Focused on what needs to happen and has little concern for anything between them and their goal. 2. Sanguine: Focused on the why; usually looking for the fun in it and will create it if necessary - “Idea” oriented. 3. Phlegmatic: Focused on who is involved and concerned for everybody’s benefit. When the people are okay, then they are okay. 4. Melancholy: Focused on how things happen, seeks to understand process. Process grounds them. They are “task” oriented. Did you notice that all four are necessary considerations? None are any more or less valuable than the other and nobody, naturally, considers them all. By now you should be starting to see and understand the need for individual (different) designs. By now, you’re even realizing that your “bully” is probably just choleric or sanguine, or if in their later years of having been “bullied,” phlegmatic and melancholy temperaments can be most stubborn. With this understanding at least the whys of your child’s behaviors based on temperament can begin to make sense to you. The process of distinguishing individuality takes an in-depth look at different layers and crossover fundamentals that are essential to self-development; a process that scales from Awareness of Individuality to Self Mastery. Other Fundamental Basics There are other fundamental basics that help to distinguish each person’s individuality and they include: • Sensory Perception: The different processes used to grasp information • Multiple Intelligences: There are many different kinds of smarts, but most school systems teach, grade and advance based only on two, yet children’s confidence and future depends on how good they feel about what they know, which is often directly tied to their behavior • Modes of Communications: How one communicates; the delivery of communications • Emotional Quotient: E.Q. is about emotional stability and collectively determines a person’s overall success more than any other learning • Environmental Influences: When you know the groups of things that are likely to affect your child you can be proactive and selective about when, how or if they are introduced into their worlds Individuality fundamentals are eye-opening for parents and those who work with children. The knowledge of these basics can significantly propel your children as individuals, as they interact with others, and determine - as adults - if they will be scarred or refined because of childhood experiences; too many adults are scarred and having to do corrective and recovery psychological work. The Awareness of Individuality is the basis for unwavering self-esteem and the foundation for resilience in our ever-changing world; every parent wants this for their child and every child wants acceptance without exception. This understanding can transform the way one perceives what an individual does and cause them to revisit what is considered “good vs. bad” behaviors, particularly in the children who have been labeled, a bully. Article Directory: http://www.articledashboard.com Zara Green is an Author, Individuality Empowerment Advocate, & Resilience Expert devoted to growing individuals UP! After surviving Hurricane Katrina and learning to successfully navigate its continuing ripple effects her life as a Public Speaker, Trainer and Life Coach is solely Individuality and Resilience focused. Realizing that most are in corrective and recovery mode she’s offering an Immediate FREE Audio Stream to lay the foundation for being Your Best YOU, www.GrownIsSexy.com |
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